How to Help Kids Become Resilient
- Written by Samantha Ball
While there is no such thing as a happiness, success or extraordinary-doer-of-things gene, all children – regardless of their cultural or social background – have the potential to do great things.
As parents, we may not be able to shield our children from the harsh realities of life or give them everything they want. However, there are things we can do to help them cope with the challenges that will surely come their way.
We can help our kids become resilient by nurturing in them this ability to deal with problems and manage difficulties, so they can keep moving forward and live full lives.
What Is resilience?
Resilience in children refers to their ability to cope with life’s ups and downs, move on and bounce back from the challenges or unwanted changes they encounter along the way.
These stressors can come in the form of losing a pet or a loved one, parental divorce, separation from one or both parents, moving homes, school examinations, etc.
Children who are resilient are better able to manage stress. Conversely, those who aren’t able to cope can suffer from anxiety and depression, and they may even require mental health therapy for children.
Where Does Resilience Come From?
Resilience is a quality that is nurtured and grown from within. A child’s socio-cultural environment, life experiences, family life and other factors can affect how resilience is developed (or stunted).
Family, particularly parents, plays a major role in the development of resilience in children. Therefore, it falls on you, the parent, to help your child cultivate this critical ability or life skill.
Tips to Build Resilience in Children
As a parent, you only want what’s best for your children. And one of the greatest gifts you can give them is inculcating in them the value of resilience.
Help them develop this trait by implementing the following tips:
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* Tell your children how much you love them unconditionally.
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* Remind them of how special they are – whether they succeed (or not) in what they do.
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* Show them the importance of taking responsibility for one’s actions.
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* Teach them to be confident in themselves whilst being humble and unassuming.
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* Encourage them to form friendships and strong bonds with extended family, such as their grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.
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* Test their decision-making skills and discuss their choices afterwards.
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* Let them know the importance of expressing themselves and dealing with their feelings.
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* Tell them that it’s fine to ask for help even when they want to be independent.
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* Help them understand that failure is a part of life, that it’s not the end and they can keep on trying.
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* Inculcate the value of utilising creative or healthy outlets for self-expression, such as participating in sports, art, music, literature and other interests.
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* Teach them the importance of seeing the glass as half full or the value of optimism.
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* Assist them in goal-setting and provide guidance in their attempts to achieve their objectives.
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* Spend time with them. Make time for fun, light excursions and take advantage of opportunities to get to know their thoughts and how they see the world.
Teaching your children the value of resilience and helping them develop it will take patience and time. However, all your efforts will be worth it as resilience is a quality that’ll help them succeed in all aspects of life.