Viw Magazine

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How to make a widowers dating site work

There is no fun in being a widower. No matter what your relationship with your late spouse was like, whether you loved each other or not, experiencing the loss of your wife or husband is always difficult. People recover from it for years. If someone tells you that they could start dating again in a month, they just lie. People overcome this sorrow for a very long time.

However, sooner or later the time when you can finally start considering a new stage in your life comes. You are open to something new. Although it is impossible to fully forget or overcome your loss, you are ready to stop feeling guilty for your choice and may start dating again. In this case, a widowers dating site could be a good starting point. It will allow you to relax a bit and feel the taste of life again. 

Why you should not start dating as a widower too soon

Most widowers struggle with their new dating experience. They think that they cannot cope with all the sorrow and very often, feel guilty for their attempts to be happy. Instead, they choose to stay single for as long as possible. Other individuals are totally the opposite.

They hurry to start a new relationship on a widowers dating site  in hope that it will help them forget about their pain and make them live again. As always, the truth is in the middle. Both options are very wrong. The process must be very natural. You should not deprive yourself of the right to be happy again, as well as you should not jump into a new relationship too soon:

  • Psychologists recommend waiting at least a year after the loss of your partner;
  • It is good to elaborate on your trauma with a psychologist if you feel you need it;
  • Starting a relationship too soon will not end up well, you will break up sooner or later because you are simply not ready for a new affair;
  • Not dating anyone for many years will lead to the atrophy of your dating abilities. 

All specialists agree on passing through all the stages after your loss. It means that your heart must heal completely. If you have not realized that you will never meet the same partner again and will still suffer because of your love, there is no need to start a new relationship. That step must be fully considerate and well-thought. 

The pros of dating sites for widowers

Widowers dating sites are really one of a kind. They are a good finding for people experiencing the heavy loss of their spouses. No other person knows what you feel and how hard it was for you to lose your beloved. Widowers dating sites have plenty of advantages:

A chance to start at least talking to someone 

When you struggle with meeting others again, a dating site for widowers will help you overcome your initial barrier. It is a great first step on your path to dating after the loss of your spouse. It is not as “scary” to talk to someone online as in reality, especially if you live in a small city where everyone knows you and you feel guilty for your wish to date. On a widowers dating site, people will never blame you for that.

All users understand how you feel very well because they all experienced the same

When you choose a widowers dating platform, you already know that all people there know what you have passed through. All of these people have the same experience. You will not even have to explain anything or have a feeling that your new partner doesn’t understand you. 

Very time-efficient 

If you are a widower who is torn between work and children, then finding time for your personal life is not that easy. A dating site is not time-consuming. You will be able to join it and use it whenever you wish (in breaks from work, while kids sleep, in grocery stores, etc.).

All single widowers interested in building a new relationship are collected in one place

You do not need to go out more and look for someone single. If you live in a megacity, finding your new spouse will be complicated. Now, you should not put in any effort because all singles are in one place. All you need to do is to browse their profiles on widowers dating sites, answer a message, or send it. 

How to find your happiness on a widowers dating site

If you have never used dating websites and do have not much online experience, there is no need to rush into things too quickly. Widowers are likely to make a few mistakes after their bad life experience and everything related to it. Apart from not starting too early after your loss as it was mentioned above, you need to stick to a few other rules that will save you from another heartbreak.

Do not look for a spouse at once

Start on a dating site just “for fun”. Of course, we know that you are a serious person and look only for a serious relationship but you should not start with the thought of finding your spouse at once. You risk being too strict with every candidate or vice versa, perceive everyone you meet on a widowers dating site as a potential spouse. In the first case, you risk missing a good person and in the second, on the contrary, you will not be too selective. Both options are not very promising. Just enjoy getting to know people and give them a chance. You never know how everything ends.

No comparisons to your late spouse

If you loved your late wife too much, you will automatically compare everyone to her. It is a big mistake because you do not need to do that. No other person will resemble her. One of the huge mistakes is to look for the same type of woman in terms of appearance. You see someone who resembles her and think that this person will be the same inside. Unfortunately, there are no two similar people. Everyone is different and you should not compare them. When you choose by physical resemblance, a big disappointment is waiting for you. 

Give a chance to different people. Just assume that you can be happy with someone who doesn’t even remind your late partner. You will be surprised but this can be exactly what you need. By the way, if you want to use this opportunity to the fullest, you may join expanded dating sites like Sofiadate instead of very specific ones for widowers. If you are a widower, it still doesn’t mean a person who never lost her husband cannot be a good match for you. 

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